How much do I spend? Lets just deal with travel to and from work. Travel time 45 minutes. Expected time based on distance 26 minutes. 19 minutes of waste in each direction. Five days per week gets me 190 minutes per week. I work 49 weeks a year. That 9310 minutes per year. Thats 155 hours or 6.46 days per year. It would be a lot worse for me if I was not coming to work at 5:30 in the morning. Driving in at 8am adds 20 minutes to the one-way travel time.
The solutions they talked about are variable rate toll highways(like near/in chicago). The rate is higher when there is more traffic. It is supposed to discourage you from using it. I think it would only matter if you somehow got beamed the rates to your car so you could decide which route to take realtime.
I think the problem is the highways. People really need to NOT use them for daily commutes. They need to live near where they work. The creation of the highway system has caused this whole mess.